DO YOU REMEMBER . . . .

when milk was delivered to your doorstep in glass bottles?

when a film, a short feature, a cartoon and a newsreel were all included in a night at the pictures?

when washing had to be put through a ringer to squeeze out the excess water?

when the bus conductress was in charge, belling the driver when to stop and when to start? Between bus stops she would do her rounds collecting the fares.

when the usual way of getting a TV was not to buy one, but to get it on rental? A weekly visit to the TV shop with the payments book was a must.

when the TV was switched on before the start of the scheduled programmes, this test card was displayed on the screen?

when the commercial station Radio Luxembourg was famous for its broadcasts of popular music?

when very often two houses had to share a phone line?

If you remember all these things, you must be getting on a bit.

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IF YOU REMEMBER (as I do) . . . .

well-dressed gents wearing spats,

gas-lit street lamps, horse-driven vans, listening to Harry Lauder on the wireless, Mrs Simpson, the launch of the Queen Mary, the Lambeth Walk, and young ladies sporting the earphone hairstyle

Then you’re definitely ancient!!!

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This is a humorous poem from the 18th century. Great fun!

ALL’S WELL THAT ENDS WELL

A friend of mine was married to a scold,
To me he came and all his troubles told.
Said he, “She’s like a woman raving mad.”
“Alas, my friend” said I, “that’s very bad.”
“No, not so bad,” said he, “for with her, true,
I had both house and land, and money too.”

“That was well,” said I;
“No, not so well,” said he;
“For I and her own brother
Went to law with one another;
I was cast, the suit was lost,
And every penny went to pay the cost.”

“That was bad,” said I;
“No, not so bad,” said he;
“For we agreed that I the house should keep,
And give to me four score of Yorkshire sheep,
All fat and fine and fair, they were to be.”
“Well then,” said I, “sure that was well for thee?”

“No, not so well,” said he,
“For though the sheep I got, every one died of the rot.”
“That was bad,” said I;
“No, not so bad,” said he,
“For I had thought to scrape the fat,
And keep it in an oaken vat,
Then into tallow melt for winter store.”
“Well then,” said I, “That’s better than before.”

“Twas not so well,” said he,
“For having got a clumsy fellow
To scrape the fat and melt the tallow,
Into the melting fat the fire catches,
And, like brimstone matches,
Burnt my house to ashes.
“That WAS bad,” said I;
“No, not so bad,” said he, “for what is best,
My scolding wife got burnt up with the rest!” (Anon)

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“Hi there! I’m Norman the Nerd from COME SURF THE NET. This new blog begins on 26th March. More details next week.”

Norman appears thanks to http://www.graphicshunt.com

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Some cheery Scottish music accompanies this video of old postcards and pictures of Speyside.



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